I dream of christmas

A couple of nights ago I had a dream about Christmas trees, snow storms, Santa hats, and Mistletoe…presents under the tree and carols playing on repeat. Ah the bliss of hot chocolate and winter break and endless quantities of my Mother’s cooking.

Unfortunately my reverie was cut short, severely disappointed upon waking up, faced with the reality of another dreary Tuesday morning Physics lecture…But then as I forced myself to get out of bed, dreading all the work that needed to be done, it suddenly struck me as odd - how much emphasis we place upon the not-now. I suppose I can only speak for myself and my obsession with time - nostalgia for the past and anticipation for the future.

I dream about Christmases of my childhood, of snowman building, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Cleveland Orchestra Concerts, massive puffy coats and mismatched scarves and hats. I miss the snowdays and the Saturday cross country races almost as much as I worry about where I’ll go to medical school, what job I’ll get after graduation, who I’ll love, and where I’ll live. But after a string of conversations with peers infinitely more wise than myself, its become clear to me that I have to make a conscious effort to live more in the present. today. this moment. Tomorrow will come regardless of whether I bother to anticipate it.

It all sounds so simple, and we hear it so often that its almost a truism. But its so much harder to actually apply day in and day out. I have to catch myself and bring my mind back from daydreaming about the day when I turn twenty-five…and limit the time I spend looking through pictures from elementary school. Lets start with the reading that must be done for Monday and the Midterm that I have to take on Tuesday, and put off the 5 year planning…just to buy myself a little bit more sanity, and a little more perspective.